Ambition can be a double-edged sword, especially for women in corporate spaces. It’s celebrated when men display it, yet scrutinized when women wield it boldly. I learned this the hard way in 2014, when a “mentor” (in quotations because she hardly was) said to me in frustration, “Your ambition scares people. It scares me. You need to tone it down.”
We’d been meeting for over a year, and we were scheduled to discuss my 5-year plan at this particular meeting. I laid it all out — PhD goals, a book I wanted to write, certifications I was pursuing, and the kind of CEO role I envisioned. She huffed and puffed and slammed her drink on the table. I’m confident every Panera Bread patron that day heard it.
Two thoughts immediately raced through my mind:
- Absolutely not, and
- This is not the person to guide me
There may have been a few choice words thrown in for good measure. She wasn’t my “mentor” much longer. Yes — she was of the Caucasian persuasion and from the Boomer generation, whose expectations and views on achievement and roles vastly differed from mine.
This experience taught me a critical lesson: while mentors don’t have to look like you, share a generational label, or share lived experiences, cultural humility and understanding can make a world of difference.
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That moment taught me more about mentorship and ambition than she probably intended. It also highlighted a hard truth about women in corporate spaces: ambition in women is often seen as a threat, not an asset. As we continue into this new year — when so many of us are setting bold new ambitions or affirming ongoing ones — it’s vital to reflect on the systems that hinder our progress and the steps we can take to dismantle them.
The reality of women in corporate leadership
My experience isn’t unique. Women across industries face this same resistance, particularly when aspiring to leadership roles. Despite progress, women remain significantly underrepresented in corporate leadership roles.
While women comprise 47 percent of the workforce, they hold only 29 percent of C-suite positions. This disparity is particularly glaring when considering the number of women in middle management who aspire to rise.
A 2023 study found that 55 percent of women in management roles aspire to higher-level roles, and 55 percent of Americans say there are too few women in executive positions, yet systemic barriers including bias, lack of sponsorship, and organizational structures that prioritize the status quo continue to limit their opportunities.
This underrepresentation isn’t just a “women’s issue.” It’s a business issue. Research consistently shows that companies with gender-diverse leadership outperform their peers. Teams of marked diversity drive innovation, better decision-making, and higher profitability. If organizations are serious about future-proofing their businesses, they need to address the leadership gap now.
Practical steps to support ambition
Change starts within our own spheres of influence. For women in corporate spaces — or those aspiring to leadership — this means building a personal “advisory board” to support your ambition.
In the movie “Back to the Future”, the flux capacitor was the component that powered the DeLorean time machine and made time travel possible. One of the key plot points of the movie was how changing something in the present affected future results.
For our purposes, we are looking to create the components that will help us affect change moving forward. This concept of mine outlines three key relationships that fuel personal and professional growth:
1. Ally (now): Immediate support
An ally offers practical help and emotional support in the present moment. They’re the colleague who has your back in meetings, the peer who amplifies your voice in a crowded room, or the friend who reminds you of your worth on a tough day.
2. Mentor (near): Skill development and guidance
A mentor helps you navigate challenges, develop skills, and strategize for mid-term goals. They coach you through growth opportunities, share their experiences, and offer constructive feedback.
3. Sponsor (far): Advocacy for your future
A sponsor actively champions your career, opening doors to opportunities and advocating for you in rooms you aren’t in. They’re the ones who say your name in conversations and rooms about promotions or leadership roles.
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Building your flux capacitor
Start by evaluating your current network. Do you have people who fill these roles? If not, be intentional about finding them. Look for allies, mentors and sponsors within your organization, professional associations or broader networks.
And don’t stop there — be prepared to pay it forward. As you rise, use your influence to elevate others. Building inclusive spaces in corporate leadership isn’t just about individual success; it’s about creating a system where everyone can thrive.
Ambition as a compliment
That day at Panera, my so-called mentor meant her words as a critique. I chose to take them as a compliment. Yes, my ambition scares people — and it should. Ambition is the fuel for progress, the spark that lights the way for change.
The same applies to you. If someone can’t handle the scale of your dreams, that’s their problem, not yours. Let them choke on your overly ambitious dust cloud as you drive that DeLorean off into the sunset.
As women set their ambitions for 2025, it’s crucial to recognize that our dreams aren’t the issue — the systems that hinder them are. We have to ambitiously dismantle those systems together. Build your personal advisory board. Advocate for equity in leadership pipelines. Push organizations to rethink their approaches to sponsorship and inclusion. Most importantly, don’t let anyone tell you to “tone it down.”
This is our moment to act — to challenge inequities, support one another, and amplify ambition as the powerful asset it is. I am optimistic that 2025 will be the year women’s leadership transforms not just individual companies but entire industries.
Because when your ambition scares people, you’re on the right track. Keep going. The future needs you.
Amira Barger
Amira Barger an executive vice president at a global communications firm, providing diversity, equity and inclusion counsel to clients. She is also an adjunct professor of marketing and communications at Cal State East Bay. Views are the author's own.